


Prank Calling (That's Not How You Do It Levi)

by Cat_Face



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin
Genre: Awkward, Fluff, German!Eren, How Do I Tag, I don't understand Japanese btw, Japanese!Levi, M/M, Singer!Levi, Trilingual!Eren, but idc it's a nice prompt, eren is a fan of japanese music, eren obsesses over a song, lazy adult!Eren, levi sucks at pranks, nor german xD, prank calling, really deep shit at the end btw, reverso.net ftw, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-08
Updated: 2014-12-08
Packaged: 2018-02-28 11:30:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2730839
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cat_Face/pseuds/Cat_Face
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Hey you called this number at like 3AM and we talked about some pretty heavy shit do you remember any of that?”<br/>----------------<br/>Levi is flying over to the United States to do a surprise concert, but since he lost a bet while on the plane he has to do a prank call at 3 am. Needless to say it was not what he was expecting at all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Prank Calling (That's Not How You Do It Levi)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Exellda](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Exellda/gifts).



> ;u; I decided to post this on here because I can... I feel more comfortable posting on here tbh, Wattpad is all strict and this site is just welcoming lmao.
> 
> Gifted to Exellda for being a fucking amazing person.
> 
> \- Edit: Added translations next to the non-English languages.
> 
> Another AU prompt from [toxixpumpkin](http://toxixpumpkin.tumblr.com/post/101021230029/awkward-first-meetings-aus).
> 
> Hush don't judge me I like those prompts okay. Btw: Imagine Levi is the singer of Gishinaki...

** Prank Calling **

Eren was currently up at 2:59 am playing some random ass game and listening to [Gishinanki](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_lKEre1Eru0). Although he would never admit it, the song turned him on a lot more than it should. But he couldn't help himself, the voice just made him  _melt._  

He was currently undergoing a solo project where he would make a MikuMikuDance for the song, make translations for German and English, then make a fanfiction based on the song. Currently he has already done the translations and started on the fanfiction, but he has yet to even touch the MMD part of it. Hell, he doesn't even know what characters to use for it. Should he use the ones from Free!? From Parasyte? Hetalia???!?

 _"I need hot male characters with a rather sly personality. I don't think there's one like that? I mean, there are plenty hot ones out there but I really don't think any of them fit into the category of the song..."_ Eren thought as he continued to stab at his keyboard as he tried to shoot at a pixelated 3D bird.

 His actions and thoughts were interrupted as he felt his phone vibrate on his lap, indicating that someone was calling at 3 am in the fucking morning. Eren stared, confused at the unfamiliar number he saw.  _"7625572826, huh."_  

"Ich wundere mich, wer es ist? (I wonder who it is?)" He said, mentally memorizing the number.

Then he picked it up.

 

**Before The Call**

* * *

_Switching to First Person Because I Don't Know How To Write In Third Person:_

 I groaned loudly. Why the hell did anybody think it was okay to just schedule a god damn concert on another country? It's unreasonable, insane, and a waste of time. Just because I have a ton of fans over here doesn't mean I need to come all the way to the U.S. to perform and get more fans! They can just obsess over me while I'm in Japan, yes?

"Kore wa sorehodo oroka desu! (This is so stupid!)" I whined - a manly whine mind you - at Erwin, my manager. He simply smiled sympathetically at me, his eyes gentle but I knew what was behind that facade. The manipulating asshat is just two meters away, although it is hidden in a crowd of thorned roses. However sweet to the smell, come too close and it will warn you off by spiking you with its sharp claws.

"Sumimasen, keredomo anata wa sore o gaman shinakereba narimasen. (I'm sorry, but you must put up with it.)" He replied, his voice deep and silky. 

"Watashi wa nemuri sae suru koto ga dekimasen! (I won't even be able to sleep!) Twenty four hours, Erwin!" I complained, slapping weakly at his arm. I had a rather prominent Japanese accent while I spoke English words, but they were still coherent. 

"It is only four o' clock pm, Levi. Watashi wa anata ga nanika o miidasudearou to kakushin shite imasu. (I'm sure you will find something.)" Erwin stated, his voice having only a slight accent to it, despite being raised in Japan along side with me.

"Yoidesu, keredomo kake o shimashou. (Fine, but let's make a bet.)" I challenged, my eyes narrowing mischievously. Erwin simply raised his gigantic fucking eyebrow at me, my challenge obviously piqued his interest. God damn competitive bastard.

"Moshi anata ga makerunara, anata wa hoka ga iu koto o shinakute wa narimasen. (If you lose the bet, you must do what the other says.)" Erwin nodded to that statement, agreeing with the terms. 

"Kake wa nanidesu ka? (What is the bet?)" The blonde asked, his voice daring.

"Tashika ni watashi wa shikamettsura o shinaide shōnen no ai hon o yomi tsudzukeru koto ga dekimasu. (Certainly I can read a boy love story without a grimace,  
unlike you.) You probably wouldn't be able to." I said, smirking while whipping my phone out. Unlocking my phone by sliding it, I opened up my internet browser.

I, of course, used the incognito version because only hell knows what would happen if my history was searched through. How utterly humiliating it would be to be labeled as a pervert. I have no problem with yaoi, though, since I am gay myself. But, seeing other people go at it is a tad bit repulsing to me, so that's why I don't have a hentai stash unlike the person sitting next to me.

"Anata wa imi shimasu yaoi? (You mean yaoi?)" Erwin clarified as he stared at me with wide eyes. 

"Ne. (Levi's way of saying yes.)" I replied, nodding while I seeped through the countless Japanese BL doujinshis. My manager gaped at me, obviously not expecting me to actually do that. 

"Hae ga hairu mae ni, anata no kuchi o tojite kudasai. (Close that mouth before flies nest in there.)" 

Erwin immediately snapped his mouth shut, but he still stared at me like I was an alien. I wouldn't be surprised, I probably would do the same. 

I continued to skim through the many well done comics and novels before something caught my eye. "[【エレリR18】たまにはこんな日も悪くない【サンプル】](http://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=medium&illust_id=45235200) (A day like this once in a while is not so bad.)" On the cover showed somebody who looked suspiciously alike to me, and when I saw the rating it said "R-18." So, obviously that meant there was some kind of action to it, right? What absolutely baffled me was how fucking  _close_ it looked to me. Were there more of these? And who the fuck is that guy on the cover, hovering over me. What the hell?

 

 

Despite all of these thoughts, I opened it up. 

"Erwin, watashi wa 1 o miidashimashita. (I found one.)" 

He glanced over at me, and though he didn't say anything, I heard him basically say, _"You're seriously doing this?"_

I only chuckled and scooted over to him, showing him my phone. He raised one of his caterpillar eyebrows again, obviously to the cover of the doujinshi. I shrugged, then scrolled down to read. It even had my name in it. It was all really fluffy with some random characters I've never seen before and I could handle that. But then came the fucking...

I tried not to make a face, I tried really really really hard. But when you're the uke of a god damn doujinshi and some guy is fucking you senseless it's hard to stay expressionless. Erwin however was having no trouble, in fact he was being amused if the little twinkle in his eyes were anything to go bye. I bit my lip, going onto ultimate try-hard mode. I finally gave up after two minutes of heavy torment and released a tiny whimper blushing hard.

Fuck. Now he was going to be in Erwin's mercy for the rest of the day. When I stole a glance to him he was already looking at me with a triumphant smirk on his face. Bastard. I knew it was a mistake to choose something with me on it, but I didn't know I would be the bottom! That makes it ten times worst than what it would be if I was the seme, dammit.

"Well, then, Levi." Erwin began, grinning like an idiot. I flipped him the bird and glared daggers at him but he ignored it. Damn immunity. This is why I don't make friends. "Watashi wa tada 1tsu no mono o hossuru dakedesu. (I only want one thing from you.)" He finished, still wearing that god forsaken expression.

"Nandesuka? (What?)" I muttered, agitated. 

"Watashi no kigen o totte kudasai. (Humor me.)" The blonde simply said. I shot him a confused glance, asking him to elaborate. So, like the good friend he is, he did.

"Itazura, nani demo shite kudasai. (A prank, anything.)" 

A prank, huh. What kind of prank? What pranks could you do on a plane, anyways?

"Itazura yōkyū? (Prank call?)" I suggested, and he shrugged in response.

"Watashi ni ransū o kudasai,-sō sureba watashi wa sore o yobudeshou. (Give me a random number, I'll call it.)" My manager nodded, pulling out an American Yellow Pages book. I have absolutely no idea how the fuck he has that, but I do not feel like questioning it, so I went with the flow.

"Watashi ni anata no denwa o kudasai. (Hand me your phone.)" He demanded gently but firmly, holding out his hand towards me but not looking away from the book. I reluctantly gave it up, watching him like a hawk to see if he ruined my beloved phone.

As soon as I heard the call dial, he handed the phone to me, giving me a thumbs up.

I groaned for the second time today, hoping this won't be regretful.

* * *

  _Back to Third Person For The Sake Of This Fic:_

A voice that sounded a  _lot_ like the singer of Gishinanki came from the other side of the phone. One with a very heavy Japanese accent, but with a voice like silk and  _pure sex._

Eren gulped and willed away the thoughts.

"Hello, do you speak English?" The voice asked, sounding irritated but hot at the same time. Who the hell even manages that, we may never know. Eren was honestly dumbfounded at why he would be calling at this time but then realized that it was only probably midday in Japan, considering the caller lives in Japan, if the accent was anything to go by.

"Yes, but I also speak Japanese, would it feel better for you to speak that instead?" Eren asked politely.

"Nihongodesu ka? (Japanese?)"

"Hai. (Yes.)"

"Ō, yoidesu. Sore wa keredomo kimyōdesu, watashi wa ichido mo Amerika kara no dare mo jissai ni watashinohaha kokugo o hanasu no o mita koto ga arimasen. (Oh, good. That's strange though, I've never seen anybody from America actually speak my native language.)" The voice replied, and to Eren he seemed slightly less irritated.

"Haha, wakarimashita. Watashi wa anata ga, soko kara ongaku ni toritsukareru koto kara, watashi ga sore o mananda to iu koto ga dekita to omoimasu. (Haha, I see. I guess you could say I learned it from obsessing over the music from there.)" The brunette replied sheepishly, but it was true. The only reason he took up Japanese was to understand the songs and anime.

On the other side of the phone Levi raised an eyebrow. Erwin was watching the scene amusedly, apparently from what he had gathered so far the one named Eren Jaeger could speak Japanese. Jaeger was a German name too, so maybe he could also speak German? Before Erwin could tell Levi about his new revelation, the raven spoke into the phone.

"Ongaku? Anata no daisukina uta wa nanidesu ka? (Music? What's your favorite song?)" 

The huge eyebrowed man raised an eyebrow for the third time that day. So the 'Eren' likes music? Most likely Japanese music. This is funny, wait til' the 'Eren' finds out the caller is one of the most renowned Japanese pop-stars in the world.

Back on the other side of the phone, the [strong titan green](http://24.media.tumblr.com/89b92fbc5b13764f43e38f6511a8503c/tumblr_n0g78whMMu1sfhb67o1_500.jpg) eyed male gulped once again. Should he be honest? Should he lie? Fuck it, he's being a good guy and going honest.

"Um.. Uh.. Gishinanki by... Rivaille.. Or, Levi, but Rivaille sounds pretty hot-- I mean!" The one on the receiving end of the call spluttered, embarrassed that he had just let that slip. Levi, however, was strongly amused by this, a smirk on his lips. He had forgotten Erwin was even on the plane, as he was so caught up in the way this boy was reacting. So he was gay, eh? This just made his day.

"Rirakkusushitekudasai, watashi wa iyada to omoimasen. Jissai, sore wa watashi o hijō ni motto shiawase ni shimasu. Anata wa, moshi anata ga jissai ni Rivaille ni attanara nani o surudeshou ka? (Relax, I do not mind. In fact, that makes me quite happier. What would you do if you actually met Rivaille?)" Levi asked, his smirk turning sly. The blue eyed blonde blinked once, then twice. Was Levi seriously flirting on the phone right now? Levi! This is not how you do a prank call!

"Watashi wa uta reru sutā ni narudeshou. (Well I would be star struck.)" Eren answered honestly. 

"Wakarimashita. Sore wa yoidesu, nazenara watashi wa rībaidearukara. Aruiwa, Rivaille, nazenara sore wa kanari hottodesukara. (That is good, because I am Levi. Or, Rivaille, because that is quite hot.)" 

Complete utter silence enveloped the entire plane. Erwin didn't move, Levi didn't move, and the other side of the phone was completely silent.

Levi braced himself for the screaming, but it certainly wasn't what he received.

"Oh." Was all that was simply said. Then, "Hey, Rivaille... Would you mind if we talked in English right about now?" 

"Ne." Levi said, nodding, before he realized the kid -- at least he thought it was a kid -- couldn't see him. "Sure, if you would like." 

Eren on the other side smiled gratefully. 

"Okay, so, um. Basically, why are you calling me?"

"Because I lost a bet."

"Seriously?"

"Yes, I had to read a BL novel with a straight face."

"And you lost..."

"Yes."

"Do you have anything against BL?"

"Of course not. I am gay too."

The whole room fell silent again. Levi realized his mistake.  _Fuck._ Erwin, however, was trying hard not to laugh. He was grinning behind his hand while the black haired male sent glares at him.

"... Then why did you lose the bet?"

"It was... Uh... It was me and another male... And... I was the uke." Levi finished quickly.

There was another quiet moment again before the caller heard a puff of air from the other side. He soon realized he was being laughed at.

"Don't laugh, you idiot! I'm sure you would react the same way!"

"I know--pfff ahah-- but still! Oh my god, who was the other guy??!"

"Some brunette with the most biggest eyes I've ever seen, and that's saying something if I'm from Japan. Not even cosplayers can beat that amount of huge eyes. I've seen large yellow eyebrows and all but damn."

"What color were his eyes?"

"Some kind of green, but not quite green, mixed with blue and then some yellow specks. Or something, I don't even..."

"That's strange, that matches my appearance.. His name?"

"Eren? Yeah, Eren Jaeger."

Another deathly silence filled the room. Erwin was full out laughing, now realizing that the name he had given Levi matched the one from the doujinshi.

"... Rivaille."

"... Yes?"

"......."

"...?"

"... My name is Eren Jaeger."

A tense blanket was thrown on top of them, Erwin still giggling like a school girl, but Levi was secretly dying inside.

"Nandesuka fakku? (The fuck?)" 

"Wait, do you think somebody supernatural made this thing and then expected us to get together and kiss and make out."

"Eren, we were fucking in that doujinshi."

"WHAT THE FUCK?"

"Exactly!"

"Wait, so, the universe wants us to fuck and become a couple."

"Maybe the universe just wants us to live together. Maybe it's fate."

"Or maybe somebody just thought of some random names and paired you together with one character."

"Yeah but that doesn't explain the reason why you had the exact appearance of the guy."

"What do you think about death?"

"What the hell is this topic change?"

"Just answer me."

"I think death.. Is a sign of release or something. In Japan we have a lot of suiciders... I personally think suicide as a release gate for those who have no options left, but that only happens if you're not human... So, if you were to suicide, that would mean you had no feelings, no emotions, nothing to resort to. That makes you inhumane, because hell, I'm a cold ass motherfucker but I still have feelings."

There was laughter on the other side of the phone that outshone Erwin's by light years. Levi really liked this new laugh he has discovered.

"Well, yeah I agree with that but if you suicide, that means you basically are drowned by sadness. That means that all emotion is hidden by the waves of sadness, and it is near impossible to find the light in that heaviness. Completely off topic, but with your accent you say motherfucker really cute to me."

"I understand that, but if somebody has the correct guide then they can reach the light. There must be something you care deeply about if you are going through something so drastically changing. You have to hold on, and if you don't hold on, you lose." Levi replied, ignoring the accent comment.

"I completely agree with that last part. I say that if you don't fight, you lose, if you fight, you win."

"I say that nothing dictates the choices you make. The difference between people is experience, and the only thing you can do is hope you don't regret you decisions."

"That's... Really inspiring."

"I know, I'm Levi fucking Rivaille. I'm always inspiring."

"Pfft."

Levi's manager then tapped him on the shoulder, mouthing, " _We've arrived at our destination. Time to get off to the next plane."_

The singer visibly deflated.

"Hey, Eren, I gotta go. Soredewa, matakondo, dārin. (See ya later, darling.) Text me, and don't you dare delete this number."

"Itoshīdesu ka? (Darling?) Aw, Levi, see ya then. And I won't, but I'll text you!" Eren sounded incredibly disappointed, but he managed to pick himself up by remember that Levi-fucking-Rivaille is in his contacts list now.

When Levi hung up, both males immediately saved each other's phone numbers for future use.

* * *

 

 Levi was woken up at 4 am in a different timezone by his annoying phone text ring. He sat up on the uncomfortable plane seat and glared at his phone, trying to make out the blurry bright letters. His eyes immediately softened as he realized who was texting him, and that it was probably midday over in the U.S., but that still didn't make him the least bit grumpier.

 **Eren:** _He_ _y you called this number at like 3AM last night and we talked about some pretty heavy shit do you remember any of that?_

Levi actually rolled his eyes. He couldn't read English very well but he could pick up a few pieces here and there to make up the rest of the sentence. He typed back a response and secretly hoped Eren could read Japanese.

 **Levi:**   _もちろん私はそうします、悪いがき。(Of course I do, shitty brat.)_

**Author's Note:**

> If you found any translation mistakes please tell me the correct translation because I only speak Cantonese and English.
> 
> And no, I don't know how to write in Chinese, but I speak it fluently.


End file.
